Common Tactics Used By A Vindictive Spouse

October 16, 2023

Mental,Abuse,Abstract,Concept,Vector,Illustration,Set.,Gaslighting,,Psychological,Manipulation,Marriage is meant to be a union built on love, trust, and respect. However, in some cases, relationships can become toxic, leading to vindictive behavior from one spouse towards the other. A vindictive spouse may resort to various tactics in an attempt to hurt, control, or gain power over their partner. It is important to recognize these tactics to protect oneself and seek the necessary help and support. Let’s explore some common tactics used by a vindictive spouse.

1. Emotional Manipulation

Emotional manipulation is a significant tactic used by a vindictive spouse. This can involve guilt-tripping, gaslighting, and playing mind games to undermine the other person’s self-esteem and make them question their own sanity. The vindictive spouse may constantly criticize, belittle, or invalidate their partner’s feelings, thoughts, and actions. This manipulation is aimed at gaining control and power over their partner’s emotions, making them more vulnerable and reliant on the vindictive spouse.

2. Financial Control and Manipulation

Another tactic commonly employed by a vindictive spouse is financial control and manipulation. This involves restricting access to money, controlling the couple’s finances, or sabotaging the other spouse’s financial stability. The vindictive spouse may limit access to joint accounts, withhold income, or incur unnecessary debts to create financial instability and dependency. Financial control and manipulation are often used as a way to exert power and control over the victimized spouse and limit their options for independence.

3. Isolation from Support Systems

A vindictive spouse may try to isolate their partner from friends, family, and support systems. They may spread rumors, badmouth the victimized spouse, or manipulate others into taking their side. By cutting off the victimized spouse from their support networks, the vindictive spouse aims to ensure that their partner has no one to turn to, leaving them feeling isolated, helpless, and without assistance in dealing with the toxic dynamics within the relationship. Isolation prevents the victimized spouse from seeking help or escaping the abusive environment.

4. Threats and Intimidation

Threats and intimidation tactics can be used by a vindictive spouse to instill fear and maintain control. These can range from verbal threats of physical harm or harm to loved ones, blackmail, or even acts of violence. The vindictive spouse may use these tactics to create an atmosphere of fear and ensure compliance from their partner. Fear of the consequences of leaving or exposing the abusive behavior can keep the victimized spouse trapped in an unhealthy and dangerous relationship.

5. Legal Manipulation

A vindictive spouse may use the legal system to their advantage, employing tactics such as false accusations, filing frivolous lawsuits, or making excessive demands in divorce or custody proceedings. They may harass their partner with endless legal battles, seeking to drain their resources, exhaust them emotionally, and gain a strategic advantage. Legal manipulation can prolong the victimized spouse’s suffering, making it difficult for them to move on from the abusive relationship.


A vindictive spouse may employ various tactics to control, hurt, and gain power over their partner. Emotional manipulation, financial control, isolation from support systems, threats and intimidation, and legal manipulation are some common tactics used. It is crucial for individuals in an abusive relationship to recognize these signs, seek help from supportive friends, family, or professionals, and take the necessary steps to protect themselves. No one should have to endure the toxic dynamics of a vindictive spouse, and by raising awareness and seeking assistance, victims can break free and rebuild their lives in a healthier, safer environment.

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